Nobody Tells You This About Retirement

When I retired from medicine, people kept telling me the same thing.

"You just need a hobby."

I remember thinking I might punch the next person who said that.

Not because they meant any harm. Quite the opposite. They were trying to help.

But after spending decades as a surgeon, solving problems, making decisions, helping patients, running a business, and constantly being challenged, the suggestion felt wildly inadequate.

A hobby?

That was the solution?

I don't think retirement is a hobby problem.

I think it's an identity problem.

For many of us, work becomes more than a paycheck. It becomes part of how we see ourselves. It gives structure to our days, purpose to our efforts, and a sense that we are contributing something meaningful.

Then one day, it stops.

Nobody really prepares you for that.

The same thing can happen when children leave home. Whether it comes through retirement, empty nesting, or both happening around the same time, many women eventually find themselves asking the same question:

Who am I when nobody needs me quite as much as they used to?

That's a much bigger question than what hobby to pick up.

Retirement sounds like freedom. And it is.

But freedom can be surprisingly uncomfortable.

I eventually realized that what I missed wasn't necessarily work itself.

I missed growth.

I missed building something.

I missed being challenged.

I missed having goals that mattered to me.

That realization changed everything.

The answer wasn't finding a hobby. The answer was finding a new purpose.

For some people, that's volunteering. For others, it's mentoring, learning, creating, traveling, starting a business, or pursuing passions that never had room to grow during a busy career.

For me, it became Champagne Chic.

Not because I needed another job, but because I needed something that was mine. Something creative. Something challenging. Something that made me excited to get out of bed in the morning.

I still enjoy golf. I still enjoy travel. I still enjoy dinners with friends.

But those things are the frosting.

Purpose is the cake.

And I suspect that's what many women are actually searching for during life's big transitions.

Not another hobby.

Another reason to keep growing.

Just a thought...

Dr. Cindy